While on vacation in Kauai last month, I ate seared Ahi and fresh mangoes, snorkeled daily and gave serious consideration to what kind of guy should (and should not) wear small underwear-like bikini swimsuits, known as Speedos.
I'd always believed that only well-muscled athletes should wear tiny trunks. A European tourist completely redefined my criteria for Speedo success. Every day, this guy (pictured) lumbered into the surf in a small blue suit, orange water wings and goggles. Somehow, he managed to look fabulous.
I returned to the mainland convinced that there is room in the proverbial Speedo for all ages and shapes of men, as long as their skin is:
A) Smooth. Hirsute fellows just make a Speedo look defeated. The poor tiny suit can't possibly be expected to gracefully restrain all that lower back fur.
B) Taut. Sure, a nice tight musculature is ideal, but fat is fine, as long as it's contained tightly within (preferably tan) skin. Saggy or jiggly need not apply.
Of course the fit of the suit is crucial. Too loose or too tight carry the same risk of eye-burning spillage. But really, it all comes down to skin.
There it is. The skinny on Speedos. I never want to discuss this again.
XO,
Ms.Chief
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